Das große Kishon-Buch. Gesammelte Satiren 1961-1969 by Ephraim Kishon

By Ephraim Kishon

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Extra info for Das große Kishon-Buch. Gesammelte Satiren 1961-1969

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Jedes Jahr dasselbe«, stöhnte er. « Jossele nickte verständnisvoll: »Ich weiß. Die Einkommensteuererklärung. « »Leider nicht. Ich muß gestehen, daß ich ein erbärmlicher Feigling bin. Und was mich am meisten deprimiert: es hilft mir nichts. Meine Bücher sind korrekt geführt, jeder einzelne Posten ist nachprüfbar richtig – und jedes Jahr werden meine Aufstellungen zurückgewiesen, weil sie angeblich falsch, unvollständig und frisiert sind. « Jossele schüttelte ungläubig den Kopf, und seine Stimme klang vorwurfsvoll: »Sagen Sie, Herr Stockler: sind Sie ein kleines Kind?

Abermals wunderte sich meine Gattin nicht im geringsten, als ich ihr den Brief vorlas: »Ganz klar. Es gibt eben Dinge, die sich mit schnödem Mammon nicht abgelten lassen. Manchmal ist eine kleine Aufmerksamkeit mehr wert als das teuerste Geschenk. « 33 Was werde ich nie verstehen, was? Noch am selben Tag bekam Ingenieur Glick ein Geschenkabonnement für die Vorzugsserie der Philharmonikerkonzerte. Am Abend des ersten Konzerts lag ich an der Ecke der Hubermanstraße im Hinterhalt. Würde er kommen?

Dieses Abonnement bekamen wir also nicht. Aber unsere Nachbarn, die Seligs, gingen auf eine Weltreise und traten uns ihr Abonnement ab. Der dritte Abend des Konzertzyklus begann wie üblich. Die Mitglieder des Orchesters stimmten ihre Instrumente (ich frage mich immer wieder, warum sie das nicht zu Hause machen), und der Dirigent wurde mit warmem Beifall empfangen. Er konnte ihn brauchen, denn draußen war es kalt. Unvermittelt hatte der Winterfrost eingesetzt 38 und einen jähen Temperatursturz bewirkt.

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