By Rodney R. Jones, Charles M. Sevilla, Gerald F. Uelmen
"(A) choice of hilarious outtakes from court docket occasions. . . . The humor derives from laypersons--prisoners, witnesses, jurors--who produce a wealth of banalities and fake pas, or from attorneys and judges, whose pomposity and long-windedness beg to be deflated."--Booklist.
Read Online or Download Disorderly Conduct: Verbatim Excerpts from Actual Cases PDF
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Disorderly Conduct: Verbatim Excerpts from Actual Cases
"(A) choice of hilarious outtakes from court events. . . . The humor derives from laypersons--prisoners, witnesses, jurors--who produce a wealth of banalities and pretend pas, or from legal professionals and judges, whose pomposity and long-windedness beg to be deflated. "--Booklist.
- The Jokers
- Cakes and Ale
- Galapagos
- The Big U
- Tong Lashing : The Continuing Adventures of Sir Apropos of Nothing
Additional resources for Disorderly Conduct: Verbatim Excerpts from Actual Cases
Sample text
I had been driving my car for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident. I was on my way to the doctor’s with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident. 52 53 DISORDERLY CONDUCT As I approached the intersection, a stop sign appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident. To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian. My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
My sole purpose in this little monologue is to record that understanding on the 59 DISORDERLY CONDUCT T he court record, and if there is any disagreement with my understanding by counsel for the defendants, which I believe there is not, to ask that that be recorded so that there be no misunderstanding subsequently by any party to this case or any third parties as to what we intend to provide. My problem with what you have said is simply that I am not altogether sure that I understand what you have said.
To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian. My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle. An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle and vanished. I told the police that I was not injured but on removing my hat, I found that I had a skull fracture. I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the roadway when I struck him. 54 Accident Reports The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran over him. I saw the slow moving, sad-faced gentleman as he bounced off my car.